Coaching Your Child (Parenting 101)

08/28/2011

Tips on Coaching Your Child

 – Written By Martin Reid –   Owner of Personal Victory

Recently, I had the honour of coaching my 8 year old son’s soccer team.  I did not initially volunteer actually, I was kinda volun-TOLD by my wife that it would be good to do. I had never coached Aaron in an organized sport before, so I was stoked to be “that dad” out there proudly coaching from the sidelines.  You have seen this great guy, the super-dad who patted kids on the head, was level-headed with the refs, and was diplomatic with the kids and parents. I was equally afraid of being that other “that dad” out there.  You probably have seen this dude too: the one that swears at the referees, reminds you of his athletic career, and plays his son way too many minutes even though the poor kid is clearly the weakest player… you know him.

There is a way to do coaching your kid right, and the reality is it is simple. Not easy, but simple. Coaching is an extension of your parenting style.  Better still, coaching is an opportunity to refine your parenting skill.  It is your chance to reinvent yourself. To redeem yourself even!

 I have never played a day of organized soccer in my life, but I realized quickly, technical coaching is secondary to relationship building.  You can get the technical stuff online.  At this level, as a parent coaching a team, shift your focus to the following areas and it will help you to be not only a better coach, but a better parent.  Here’s a nifty acronym: I.C.E. – Identify, Cheer and Extract

1. IDENTIFY: understand your players: are they coordinated, are they fast? Are they happy? Are they determined?  Are they teachable?
2. CHEER: once you have a basic understanding of your little athletes’ personalities and profile, cheer them on in their strengths, and give them challenges that will nudge them out of their comfort zone, and perhaps even fail in this encouraging environment.   A simple example is putting a player that is focussed on winning on a weak shift so that he has to deal with disappointment and make new strategies to succeed (with your help, coach!)
3. EXTRACT: after going back to well numerous times to identify and encourage your children, you will soon see you can extract new talents out of them.  The reality is, it is in them but untapped until NOW!!!! There will be a newfound confidence to do new things, scary things, and previously technically impossible things.

Like good coaches, good parents can recognize their children’s talents, and can stretch them beyond their comfort zone into something special. I thank my wife for this learning opportunity. Like an arrow in the hands of an archer, coaches have the potential to point kids in the direction of their potential and shoot them off towards their future!  Let’s be “that dad” out there coaching on the sidelines.

  Martin is a busy dad of two busier boys.  He is the owner of PersonalVictory.ca, a fitness consulting company committed to helping people reach their potential. His hobbies include posting crazy exercises on Youtube and blogging about fatherhood in hopes of making good men better.

Winner of the The Committed Entrepreneur Awards 2010

Follow Martin for fabulous information as a father and personal coach at:

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