The Perfect Mom

04/13/2013

In our Mom and Baby session the other day there was a presenter that joined us sharing her personal experience with PPMD. Her main goal was to make us aware of those feelings and to talk about them with support. She made our group the platform for us to open up about those days that are less than perfect or ideal in our eyes. She created that discussion about the “Perfect Mom Myth,” and an opportunity to really share our thoughts.

What I am hoping all moms gained from this topic is the awareness that there is no perfect mom out there. It seems that often as first time moms we may feel like we are failing because we don’t know what we are doing! That is what I believe is so magical about being a woman, a mother. That our instincts are there to guide us, our emotions and ability to communicate are there to help build that perfect mother for that child.

No we are not here to do it on our own, often it may feel like it, but we are here to love, nurture and protect this new being.  The discussion was helpful when the presenter shared that there would be days when you thought that perhaps becoming a mom was not the greatest idea for you, that you just want to sleep and want her to quit crying!

We all shared a moment that was less then perfect for us, that time when we felt unsure of what to do or how to feel.  And then one by one we broke down those expectations and validated those feelings. Because we are the ones that had created that “perfect” mom in our head! We are the ones that watch that mom with three kids all dressed nicely and she’s looking  together out  grocery shopping. And you think how does she do it? Oh I wish I could be like her. Sometimes we are our worst critic.

Because little do you know that just a half hour before she was at home trying to put makeup on with a toddler sticking his hands in toilet and a daughter trying to put makeup on all over her face and wanting to get out the door but forgot that the baby still needed to eat! But she is a perfect mom because she is trying her best and has found the support she needs. That’s all. Her house is not always spotless, her clothes are not always folded and her children don’t always say please. And the time that she makes for herself may not always be by herself! That it may be right then in the grocery store wondering the isles.

Some of us may think that no one else can do our job as mom, some of us may think that we wish we had someone else to do it! Your husband may never do it right, but hey at least he is trying! Your lack of sleep sometimes will get you in those weird funks where you don’t want to be around anyone. And there may be days that you never feel like you have accomplished anything! The main thing is that your baby is safe, clean and fed. And that you are safe, clean and fed too! Find the support you need to share your good times and your bad. Break down that “perfect mom” stereotype and know that most of us are just trying to do our best! Because they are loved and hugged and kissed everyday.

I would love to hear where you find your support?