A Message for Every Mother

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A Message for Every Mother

03/01/2013

My worth as a mother is not determined by my feeding choices, how well my baby sleeps at night or how clean my house is. When my baby cries in a busy restaurant, it is not a reflection of my abilities as a parent, nor will I apologize for it. Where my baby sleeps and what I feed my baby is no one else’s concern.

All too often our society quickly and harshly judges mothers for the choices they make about their bodies and their children. Being a mother is tough enough as it is, without the glares, snickers, and whispers that tend to occur amongst mothers, grandmothers, and the population in general.

I will shamefully admit that shortly after my daughter was born, I was insecure. I was a first-time mom trying to navigate foreign waters, and wondering if my choices were right, worried about what other people were thinking and saying. My insecurity, while no excuse, led me to judge the choices that other mothers were making. It took the support of several amazing mommas to show me that we are all doing the best that we can.

Each and every one of us is trying desperately to do right by our children, while balancing an enormous mound of responsibility. Sometimes we forget, as mothers and as a society, that what we need most of all is support, support for the choices that we have made.

My support came in the form of old friends and new, moms just like me, navigating foreign waters. I will be forever grateful to Mommy Connections and Mother Haven, for the connections and comfort I received.

In those dark moments, when you feel lonely, vulnerable and overwhelmed, as though you are making every wrong choice possible, remember:

You are strong.

You are incredible.

You are not alone.

chelsey

0 Responses to “A Message for Every Mother”

  1. Heidi Hovis says:

    Hey Chelsea.

    I’ve been there as well, even though I’ve already raised two children into their teens, once I had my last two who are three and 9months, I still fell back on old insecurities and find myself comparing or asking others what I should be doing. I forget that I’ve done this before and I know what I should be doing. I have changed my reaction to children crying in public, instead of glaring at the mother for letting her child disturb my peace, I will usually say something to her that might make her smile or let her know that I understand and support her in that moment. The worse things we can do to our fellow mothers is make them feel like they are being judged. We all need support and we can all offer it whenever an opportunity arises, if we just change the way we see and think about what we see. Thanks for sharing your thoughts and inspiring mine.
    ~Heidi~

  2. chelsey says:

    Heidi!
    Thank you for your words. You are so right; us mommas need to stick together. My best advice to all parents -moms especially- would be to trust your instincts!
    ~chelsey

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