Tips for Surviving the First Year – Momma Blog Feature

06/20/2017

I am 28 years old and a first time mom to a baby girl who will be a year at the end of April. Where has the time gone? I will have been married for 3 years in the summer. My husbands put up with my crazy ideas for over 10 years though. I am also a crazy dog lover and have 2 fur babies as well – one is a rescued black lab heeler and the other is a dachshund. They are the goofiest pair of friends. I am passionate about my family, friends, being outdoors, fun adventures and teaching and inspiring children. I will be returning to work at the beginning of April and will be teaching grade 2 to add another thing to my crazy life.

Since this is our first baby, we have found that we have made some mistakes but we have learned even more. My newest challenge will be balancing work, being a mother, and a wife. I hope to inspire and help other moms by sharing my relatable stories.

Surviving the First Year

by Amy Holland

Our daughter just turned 1 at the end of April. My husband and I reminisced about the amazing memories that we made this past year and how quickly the time went. I am sure that many of you moms can relate to this. We also talked about how we basically survived the first year even though sometimes it didn’t feel like we would.

Tips for Survival:

1. Take in everything you can learn. The good, the bad, and the ugly. Try to think of everything as a learning experience and it will help you in the long run.
2. Know that it will get easier. Everything will seem like a challenge when you are in the moment. If it’s not one thing it’s another. I personally worried about EVERYTHING. This stressed me out more than it needed to. You will slowly get into a routine and you’ll eventually wonder why you worried so much to begin with.
3. Ask for help. Use your spouse/partner as much as you can. That’s why they’re there. My husband was only able to help out for a week and that was the most amazing week. We were able to bond so much in such a short time.  Ask for help from your family when needed. Sometimes caring for a baby can be very lonely. I know that I experienced this personally. I would spend what felt like days and days at home by myself and I was so happy when my mom could come over to visit and bring lunch to keep me company. I still enjoy iy to this day. We are able to share memories in a different way now that baby is older.
4. Take in every piece of advice. Whether it is from your parents, in-laws, or books. You can filter out advice and choose what will work for your family. Take them all with a grain of salt too.
5. Expect Change: changes to your body, changes to your family, changes to your relationship, changes to the way you think about everything. This is completely normal. Just remember that there will always be changes for the rest of your child’s life. Embrace the amazing changes that are going on in your life.
6. Join mommy groups: I met a lot of mommy friends through Mommy Connections, swimming, library programs and indoor playground dates. It is amazing to have other moms to talk to who can relate to exactly what you’re going through.  It will also help your baby meet some friends similar in age to play with, as well, as keeping you from isolating yourself.
7. Take care of yourself first. If mommy isn’t in good health and happy then she will struggle to take care of baby. I often over did it and I would get burnt out. I had to start going to bed earlier and taking time for myself to relax. Whether it is a shower in peace, pedicure, or simply a walk alone. These things can often make a world of a difference when you’re struggling to stay afloat.
8. Something that I have really struggled with has been comparing babies. I don’t mean to but I can’t help it. I always want to make sure that my daughter is doing the best she can. I am constantly going on the internet and reading up on things to make sure that she is hitting milestones and growing as she should for her age. One piece of advice I have on this is to only worry about your own baby and yourself. I stressed myself out so many times that I wish I could go back in time and change that.  As a teacher, I should take a piece of advice out of my own book when I always tell my students to worry about themselves and not others.
9. Have a sense of humour and keep things in perspective. Laugh at the little things because they really are little things. There will be days where you haven’t had time to shower, your baby is super fussy or your house is a mess. Just laugh and move on because it is out of your control. These are just little things in the long run. It is important to set priorities as not overwhelm yourself and let the things go that are not in your control or priority.