Pick your battles

12/23/2017

Pick your battles

Being a parent is the toughest job I have ever had. And now that we are out of the baby stage and leaving the toddler phase, we are entering the little person phase. Everyone talks about the early days with a baby and the trying stages with a toddler, but nobody talks a whole lot about the phase when that toddler is becoming a little person and wants their independence.

I have quickly learned that it’s important to pick my battles. My new philosophy is if it’s not going to hurt her or someone else than maybe I need to let it go. I have been working on this for a couple of months now and have learned that it reduces the stress in all our lives when I let the little stuff go.
Does it really matter if she wants to wear heart pants and a striped shirt? Nope. Then have at it, little one. If this means, there is no battle in the morning to get dressed then I’m all for it. No, it’s not the outfit I would have chosen for her to wear but she’s happy and we had a stress free, calm morning.

Meal times can be another struggle- our house rule is you try one bite of it first, if you don’t like it you can have a peanut butter sandwich. I have discovered that by giving her the option to decide if she likes the meal or not that 9 times out of 10 she realizes she likes the meal and eats it up. We used to just say well that’s what we are having for dinner so that’s what you’re eating and it would result in a crying fest and no one enjoying the meal. Now we say try one bite then decide if you like it. She usually says Yummy!! It’s another battle that we don’t have to fight about.

Providing choices has really helped in picking the battles too- it’s not a free for all its do you want the red cup or the blue cup today, do you want to eat breakfast or get dressed first? We still have control of what needs to happen, but it lets her have some independence and be guided in the right direction with far less battles.

It hasn’t solved all our daily battles, but it is a giant step in the right direction.