Let’s Discuss Stress

07/15/2018

What exactly is stress? Well according to Medicine Net stress can be defined as “a physical, mental, or emotional factor that causes bodily or heavy tension.” Stress can either be internal or external, meaning that stress can be caused by the environment or by illness.

We mainly talk about stress in adults. We use phrases like “Work was so stressful today.” or “When am I going to feel less stressed?” Well, the truth is, we’re not the only ones who feel the pressure and feel the stress. Children feel it too. In fact, children as young as two can identify stress and can feel it in themselves.

When you think about it, that’s a little scary. Like children shouldn’t be worrying about stress, let alone know what that word is. How do we detect signs in our kids? What can we do to help them?

Signs of stress are sometimes harder to detect in children because their symptoms are less noticeable or we think they’re a developmental factor, not a stress factor. For instance, stress symptoms can include mood swings, acting out, nauseous, or headaches. They can also cause a child to become more clingy, or even more withdrawn.

So, how do we help them cope with stress? Well, a proper diet and proper sleep schedule can help with that. But sometimes you need more. I suggest having coping skills, not only for your children but for yourself too. Have a variety of different coping mechanisms, that way if one fails, you have others to try.

The photo below is called a “stress stoplight.” I use this for myself and my kids. I try my hardest to check in with them, and I ask if how they’re feeling. If they answer green (which means good) I’ll ask them to explain. Mostly my kids tell me they’re happy which is great because they’re understanding different feelings. If you child says yellow, like mine, sometimes do you ask them again how they’re feeling. However, once they explain their feelings you give them some solutions like breathing exercises or stretches. ALWAYS remember to ask them what they want to do. Choice is important! If they get to red, make sure your different coping mechanisms are in place and allow your child to go off on their own to calm down. Letting them to do what they want helps with this process (as long as it’s safe for them to do).

Now I know that I’ve thrown a lot of information your way, but always try to remember that even though they are kids their concept of stress is very much real and everyone should take that very seriously.

Some Coping Mechanisms I use for my Children

• Yoga
• Trampoline
• Stressballs
• Colouring
• Listen to music
• Glitter bottles (a bottle full of glitter, helps give them time to calm down)
• A quiet spot in low lighting
• Punching bag ( yes I have a punching bag for myself, and if my children are angry I sometimes let them use it. However, they know that violence is not okay so they know they can only hit the bag and nothing else)

There are many different coping mechanics; you have to find what works best for you and your children.

Sources:

https://kidshealth.org/en/parents/stress.html

https://www.psychologyfoundation.org/Public/Resources/KHST_Download_Resources/Copy_of_Download_Resources.aspx?WebsiteKey=7ec8b7ce-729b-4aff-acd8-2f6b59cd21ab&hkey=0e18b555-9114-49b4-9838-084fab967f0e