School in the Age of Covid – Mommy Blogger

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School in the Age of Covid – Mommy Blogger

August 20, 2020

My name is Erin. I’m a toddler mom and a pup mom. I had my son in May of 2016. Becoming a mom was the scariest thing I’ve ever done, and I have loved every moment of it. I am a stay at home writing mom. I write everyday after my son goes to bed. My partner occasionally works away from home. When he’s home, we spend as much family time together as possible, and when he’s gone, I practice my Solo Mom Life. Life isn’t always easy, but I try to be as grateful as I can. My son helps with that. You can find my blog at thewritingmomma.ca or follow me on Instagram and Facebook at thewritingmommalife

My son started preschool last fall. It was his first experience with school, and then abruptly, in March, it ended. It was a small preschool, and he was only three at the time. I was sad that he didn’t get to say goodbye to his friends and teachers.

This Fall, he starts Pre K. It will be in an actual school, and in my heart, it will be a bigger deal than his preschool was. I will walk him to school and to his classroom in September.

This alone causes me to feel all the emotions. It’s something to celebrate, and also a big moment for both of us. My baby boy is growing up. I probably could have written a whole post about how I felt about him going to school for the first time.

It’s a lot. I’m both sad and excited to see him go. These emotions should be enough. Simply going to school for the first time should be all any of us are going through. Instead we have to worry about going to school in the Covid age.

I know some people aren’t as worried, but I am a worrier. Just because you tell me not to worry, doesn’t mean I won’t. I know many moms are unsure how to proceed with the new school year. As a Mom who deals with anxiety, adding Covid to my son’s first public school experience makes life just a bit more scary. 

This is a topic that has been written about many times, and it feels like every time I open up any of my social media accounts, I see more about it. I don’t know as much as I should, and there is so much more to Covid that I will probably ever understand. That being said, writing helps me make sense of how I am feeling, and how I want to feel. I think many people should follow up their social media posts with “in my opinion.” This post is written from my perspective, and in my humble opinion. 

The truth is, we can keep my son home for this year. He’s only four. He doesn’t have to go to Pre-K. I can keep him in a bubble for one more year. But I don’t want to. He needs to spend time with other kids, and learn from teachers. He needs to experience a world that isn’t our house or backyard. I’ve been a stay at home mom for four years, and this will be his chance to explore the world without me, and my chance to remind myself who I am when I’m not a mom. 

The decision to send him comes with guilt. What if he gets sick? What if I get sick? What if we get somebody in our family sick because he went to school. 

If I don’t send him, I will feel guilty because he needs to be with others, he needs to meet new friends, and experience life at school. He’s got friends, but school will give him a chance to find new friends, and learn new things. If I kept him home, I would feel guilty because I want him to live life without fear. Right now he’s worried about going to school because he claims he is shy and doesn’t want to be away from me. I want him to know he can do anything, and I want him to feel confident in the world away from his momma.

I want to send him to school, and I don’t want him to feel that I’m nervous or anxious. I want him to jump into this new experience without the fear that I feel. He can sense my emotions, and I want him to go to school feeling excited and happy. I will save my tears until after he walks into the classroom for the first time. My son will do great. His wacky and amazing personality will allow him to be himself, and to be brave with his life.

My son is only four, but he and I will wear masks into the school. He is old enough to understand the germs, and he knows that right now, we have to wear them. I have spoken to his Pre K teacher, and I’m almost comfortable with the class size, and with the plans they have. I felt the government’s plan was lacking, but the schools are working hard. We want to stay safe, and I will always worry. It’s my job as a mom to worry, but I’m going to trust that he is taken care of. I also am expecting quite a few sick days because kids are always sick – Covid or not.

If you are sending your kid to school this Fall, I’m sending lots of strength to you. If you have chosen not to send your child to school this Fall, I am sending lots of strength to you. We are all in this together as parents, and this is not the time to judge.   

 

Thanks for reading,

Erin McCrea

 

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