One Great Big Happy Family – Mommy Blogger

07/13/2018

Elyse Lalonde has always called Saskatoon home. She started on the motherhood journey in the Summer of 2015 when she had her son. Elyse is a working mom, always seeking a fine balance in life with a busy toddler. As a MommyConnections “alumnus,” she enjoys socializing with moms and babies her son’s age. Elyse has always enjoyed writing and journaling, and hopes to share her experiences (good, bad, and sarcastic) with the online parenting community in Saskatoon.

We have an upcoming Family Reunion this summer. So, lately, I have been pondering the “time-warp” between child rearing in today’s world versus the early 1900’s.

My Great Grandparents had close to 20 children. In fact, many families within our Family Tree have numerous siblings and children or grandchildren of their own.  People in multitudes. This is not something that I can relate to, as a person who only has one other sibling and only one child.

I contemplate what it means to have such a large family, and try and put myself in the shoes of an early 1900’s rural farmer– and a female one, at that. I imagine both the shear necessity, and yet the difficulty of rearing many children. I try and place this in the context of today, and, really, only one thing comes to mind: how thankful are we for the modern-day science, education and technology that begins with a “B” and ends with “Earth Control!”

So here are a few comparisons of child rearing today, versus the 1900’s.

1. Plumbing in general.

• Back in the day, family baths were a real thing. Often a weekly occurrence, but perhaps greater. No word of a lie: you didn’t want to make the mistake of throwing the baby out with the murky, diluted, communal bath water. As for today? My kid has approximately 4 different options to bathe or shower in. One luxurious option includes a 3-person jetted tub. All to himself, almost every day.

2. Central Heating:
   • 100 years ago, there were “working” wood fired stoves inside the homes insulated with hay bales, which is totally safe by the way…. Also, 6+ kids to a bed. People avoiding going outside, at all costs, to use the privy at -40 below… I complain about putting my toddler in his Carseat at -40 below where I “momentarily” freeze before seating myself and my son in our luxury Swedish vehicle with heated seats and hot air blasting through the vents.

3. Access to Food
   • My three-year-old Grandpa could round up some sheep and witness animals being slaughtered for food. Meanwhile, my three-year-old son can be found on the couch eating a pre-packaged granola bar, with a side of fruit imported from a tropical country, asking me what’s for supper.

4. Entertainment
   • My aunts and uncles spent time outside, all day, away from home and supervision, playing in farm yards, crouching in abandoned, collapsing farm houses. Literally, collapsing buildings—nevermind, the risk of exposure to the elements or other daily life-threatening challenges.
   • I think about the real struggle to keep the iPad steady as we bounce up and down on the grid road on the way up to our family cabin. God forbid that Netflix cuts out after we lose our data signal. Also, my kid can find the YouTube app on my phone. That is really useful.

Comparing these two ages, I ask how different could parenting possibly be?

I cannot tell you the amount of times I’ve discussed with my friends, fellow mommies, coworkers, and family about the challenges of raising a kid today. Raising a child to make smart decisions, to question what he sees, what he is told is true, what should or shouldn’t be in the way of the world, be it equality, privilege, political correctness, or other in an existence that changes quickly, where information and technology are available immediately at your finger tips. The sheer amount of energy it would take to do the same with nearly 20 children baffles my mind.

But here we all are, products of our time, and yet we define our time. Our foremothers and fathers were bringing up the next generation in the best way they knew how, with the resources and support that they had available to them at the time. They were large families, looking after one another. And we’re still doing this today. In our own different ways, yet, together.

I appreciate many of these things we take for granted. At least, at the end of the day, I can sit on a toilet that flushes, where I can use the most plush and fluffy toilet paper to avoid any paper cuts in unholy places…. And my son can do the same.