If I Could Talk to My Younger Self…


If I Could Talk to My Younger Self…


If I Could Talk to My Younger Self…

my highschool graduation

my sisters and I with our maternal Great-Grandpa

my friends and I dressed up for Twin Day in high school

my grandma, mom, and I at my mom’s high school graduation


I had my life paved out for me at five-years-old.  My kindergarten yearbook says so. I was going to be a teacher.  And that was that.

As I got older, I never really wavered from that goal.  I spent my high school years admiring my teachers and the dedication they had to their students. I fell in love with English (as books really were my first love) and spent 4 years with an English teacher who taught me why Shakespeare was important.  High School convinced me that being a High School English teacher was my future.

Cue University.  Here is where I became passionate about topics that I didn’t even know were a thing when I was in my high school bubble. I learned about social justice and racism being socially constructed and feminism.  I learned that there was a world outside of the one I had created for myself and I was so excited to get out and change it.  Through these years, I spent a lot of time stressing. Over everything.  Over grades and money and weight and work and relationships and my future.  I spent hours thinking about my future, worrying and dreaming about my future.  And I had headaches.  I had headaches all the time.

Then I graduated and I was a teacher.  A fully-educated, fully-certified teacher.  Thrown out into the work-force.  I was lucky early-on and got a teaching position (one completely outside my realm of training, but it was a job) and I thrived in the classroom.  I was happy and satisfied by my work and for once, I didn’t feel like I needed to worry so much.  Then the contract ended and another one didn’t come and I went back to being a stressed-out crazy person who spent four years on the sub list.

Then life happened.  It just stepped right in and said “nope, this isn’t working for me.  I vote you realize you have PPD, you get knocked up, your husband gets a promotion, the promotion involves moving to a different city mid-pregnancy, and hey, while we’re at it, I have genius idea – start a business.”  And then I did and I did and he did and we did and I did.  And this last year has been an incredible whirlwind of emotions and here we are.  Alive.  Figuring it out.  Getting by.  Surviving.

So if I could go back and give my younger self some advice, I’d tell her to relax.  RELAX. Enjoy life. Enjoy the easy parts. Enjoy the lack of commitment and the lack of responsibility.  Enjoy the years of all of your financial obligations adding up to $600 a month.  Enjoy the freedom.  I’d tell her to stress less. About everything.  Is it going to matter in a week? In a month? In a year? I know that’s cliché to say, but it’s so true. If it isn’t going to matter down the road, it isn’t worth your energies.  I’d tell her to follow the path.  Let things happen.  Life isn’t going to go how you expect it to but that doesn’t mean it’s going to go badly.  So just let it all go and screw the paved road – the backroads are always more fun anyway.


What would you tell your younger self?


One response to “If I Could Talk to My Younger Self…”

  1. Tania says:

    Someday you will look back at your today younger self and realize that everything happens for a reason and it went exactly how it needed to.

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